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Tales of the AAA/Grimmjow
Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez was sitting at the table with three girls. "So, ladies...", he said, "...want to head home?" "Actually...", one of them said, "...we'd prefer to wait for our friend." "Well, of COURSE we're going to wait for her.", Grimmjow said. "SHE'S the hot one!" The girls, all offended, slapped Grimmjow and walked out. Grimmjow simply laughed. "I'M the hot one, hm?", a female voice said beside him. Grimmjow turned. Standing in front of him was Tier Harribel. "Oh.", Grimmjow said. "You're here. Want to head home?" Harribel laughed. "I don't see why not.", Harribel said. The two walked out of the Partys Bar, heading for the admin tower. GRIMMJOW Grimmjow woke up to the light of the sun in his eyes. He slowly got up to see Harribel turned with her back away from him. She was still asleep. Grimmjow then saw a piece of paper on his dresser that had not been there before. He grabbed it and read it. It read: Dear Grimmjow, Last night I believe I could hear you having sex with a random hooker off the street. Next time, could you mind being louder? It was hard for me to masturbate while holding a cup to the wall. Sincerely, Brandon Grimmjow angrily clenched the note in his hands. "How the HELL did he get in here?!", he thought to himself. Suddenly, he heard Harribel moan. This startled Grimmjow, causing him to physically jump so hard that it shook the bed. "Morning, Grimmjow.", she said. Suddenly, the door was kicked down. Several police officers ran in. "Hands up!", one of them shouted. "What the hell's going on?!", Harribel shouted. "I SAID HANDS UP!", the officer shouted again, shooting Harribel in the shoulder. "Damn you!", Grimmjow shouted, pulling a sword from a sheath on his belt. The officer pulled out a taser and pressed it against Grimmjow's kidney. Grimmjow started convulsing before falling on the ground, the officer picking him up. Another officer picked up Harribel by the arm, the pain causing her to scream loudly. The officers had managed to make it to the lobby when Braden and Brandon, wearing a Deadpool suit, both came out of their respective apartments. Braden shot and killed one of the officers with a repulsor ray, sending the officer's body flying down to the ground floor. Brandon slashed the officer carrying Harribel across the chest, killing him. Seeing this, the officers fired upon both of the admins. However, bullets simply bounced off of Braden's suit, and Brandon simply regenerated what had been shot. "Oh, hey.", Brandon said. "You may be wondering why the red suit. It's so bad guys can't see me bleed." Brandon pulled out a pistol as Braden pointed several missiles at the police officers. "Now let Grimmjow go...", Braden said, "...or this is gonna get a LOT messier." "It doesn't have to end like this!", an officer shouted, pointing a gun at Braden. "You're right.", Braden said. "So let him go." "At least tell us WHY you're arresting them.", Brandon said. "To be honest, we don't know.", the officer said, putting his gun down. "We were just given direct orders from Fleet Admiral Sen--" "The Fleet Admiral?", Braden asked, the missiles going back into the suit's arm. "What does HE want with Grimmjow? We're going with you." "Fleet Admiral Sengoku said that he wanted Grimmjow and Harribel ONLY.", the officer said. "Why Harribel, too?", Braden asked. "Sengoku believes them to be compatriots.", the officer said. "Well, I don't care what Sengoku said!", Braden said. "We're coming with you and that's final!" "Chess!", the officer shouted. "Gotcha.", Chess said as he readied three arrows, firing them all into Braden's suit. Braden fell on the ground, Brandon running to his side. The officers ran down the spiral staircase as Chess readied three more arrows, firing them into Brandon's head. Chess followed the officers as Brandon fell on the ground. "Braden, are you okay?", Brandon asked. Braden coughed up blood inside his suit. "Obviously not.", Braden said. "But you have to stop them from taking Grimmjow and Harribel!" "How are you gonna be healed?!", Brandon asked. "I'll call Orihime.", Braden said. "Don't worry about me. Stop them from escaping!" Brandon hurriedly ran down the stairs as Braden dialed Orihime's phone. The officers and Chess were dragging Grimmjow and Harribel out the front door, where the Salamander lay in wait. Brandon reached the ground and ran after the officers and Chess, who were already on their way into the Salamander. He ran out the door, pulled out a pistol, and shot Chess through the head. "What the--?!", the officer shouted. "Brandon?!", Grimmjow asked. Brandon put away his pistol and pulled out his sword. He sliced the officer into several pieces. However, no blood was spilled. The pieces of the officer floated up. "I have the powers of the Berry-Berry Fruit!", the officer, named Very Good, shouted. "It's berry deadly!" "That was berry bad.", Brandon said, slicing Very Good's head in half. The pieces of Very Good's body fell on the ground. "I swear, I'm no better than them.", Brandon muttered to himself. Another officer, named Shu, grabbed a missile launcher and fired it straight at Brandon, sending Brandon flying into another apartment. "There is no time to waste!", Shu shouted. "We must get these criminals to Fleet Admiral Sengoku!" "To the watchtower!", an officer shouted. The Salamander drove off. #### Brandon shook off several pieces of the wall. "Brandon?!", Adriel asked as he and Lala ran to Brandon's aid. "Grimmjow's been taken!", Brandon said. "Braden and I managed to kill four of his kidnappers, but I was shot with a missile launcher. And there's something else you won't like: They're using the Salamander!" "The Salamander?", Adriel asked as he was having flashbacks about his battle with Gasparde. "Adriel, are you okay?", Lala asked. "The Salamander...", Adriel said, "...Gasparde's ship..." "You need to lie down!", Lala said as she grabbed him and put him over her shoulder. Lala ran into the apartment's living room, placing Adriel on the couch and turning on the TV. A rerun of Gotham was on. Brandon walked out of Adriel's apartment through the front door. Braden was still on the ground, the arrows still in his suit, and no Orihime to be found. #### Grimmjow and Harribel, whose gunshot wound was patched up, were sitting in the back of the Salamander. "Okay, guys.", Shu said. "We have found out the reason of your arrest: Credit card fraud." "WHAT?!", Grimmjow and Harribel shouted in unison. "Fleet Admiral Sengoku got a call from Kingly Cinemas.", Shu said. "They reported that yesterday over 10,000 tickets for Ant-Man were purchased under your names and they have not been paid for." "Ant-Man?!", Grimmjow shouted. "I haven't bought any tickets for that movie! I'm not interested in seeing that movie!" "That is what the movie theater said.", Shu said. "So whether or not you bought those tickets, someone needs to pay for them." Grimmjow and Harribel looked at each other. "Who could've done this?", Grimmjow asked. #### Orihime was running up the spiral stairs. "I'm sorry I'm so late!", she shouted upon seeing Braden on the floor. She ran to Braden's body, ripped out Chess' arrows, and placed her hands on him. Within seconds Braden's wounds were healed. "Thanks, Orihime.", Braden said. "I heard about what happened with Grimmjow.", Orihime said. "Oh, shit, that's right!", Braden said as Orihime helped him up. "We have to save him!" #### "Who's someone we've both shared our information with?", Grimmjow asked. "That's too many people.", Harribel said. "Psst!", a voice across the room said. "Who is that?", Grimmjow asked. "My name is Naraku.", the voice said. "I overheard your conversation, and I can relate." "So?", Harribel asked. "Can you get us out of here?" "Harribel...", Grimmjow said, putting his hand over her mouth, "...shut up. We can't trust him." "You and your admin propaganda...", Naraku said. "It's the scourge of the world. And, if you let me go, I will wipe them out for you." Suddenly, a female Marine walked in. Grimmjow was immediately infatuated by her looks, pressing his face against the bars. The Marine pulled out a cattle prod and pressed it against Grimmjow's cheek, shocking him and sending him flying into the wall. "Hey, what was that?", Naraku asked. "Are you two plotting something?!", the Marine shouted. "Hina, no, don't assume.", Naraku said. "WHAT DID HINA SAY ABOUT CALLING HINA BY THAT NAME?!", Hina shouted, storming into Naraku's cell and slamming the door shut. "No, wait, wait--!", Naraku shouted before Hina slammed the cattle prod into his kidney. Hina stormed out of Naraku's cell, once again slamming the door (where Grimmjow visibly saw Naraku coughing up blood), before storming out of the room. "She uses the third person!", Grimmjow said. "How cute♥!" Harribel slapped him so hard that Grimmjow coughed up blood. "You still there?", Naraku asked. "Yeah. we're still here.", Grimmjow said. "Although there's no way in hell I'm letting you out." "Fine then.", Naraku said angrily. "But have you considered the State Farm?" Suddenly, Grimmjow and Harribel had a lightbulb. "That's it!", Grimmjow said. "That bastard, Jake!", Harribel shouted. "Wait, you and I have the same agent?", Grimmjow asked. "EVERYONE does!", Harribel shouted, hitting Grimmjow on the head. "He's the only agent!" "Then we need to get out of here and get our revenge on that bastard!", Grimmjow shouted, standing up. "Harribel, you may want to step back." Harribel leaned against the wall. "Grind.", Grimmjow said. Grimmjow's appearance slowly became more cat-like. "Desgarrón!" The claws on Grimmjow's arms suddenly grew longer. Grimmjow slashed at the bars of the cage and then ran out, slashing down the doors. "He is such an idiot.", Harribel said, putting her face in her hand. #### The sirens started blaring. Several Marines on the ground floor looked around, shocked. "Where's the State Farm?!", Grimmjow shouted, running into the room. "Fire!", Hina shouted as she and multiple Marines pulled out flintlocks and started to fire upon Grimmjow. Grimmjow effortlessly sliced the bullets in half with Desgarrón, then started running towards the Marines, striking them down. Grimmjow then looked Hina in the eye, charging towards her. "Wait!", Hina shouted. "Spare Hina--!" Grimmjow sliced her several times across the chest, killing her. "Hina!", a weird-looking Marine named Jango shouted. "You're gonna pay for this!" Jango and his partner, Fullbody, pulled out flintlocks and began firing. "Alright, if you wanna die so bad...", Grimmjow shouted, "...I'll oblige you!" Grimmjow sliced Jango and Fullbody, both hitting the ground. "Seriously, can ANYONE tell me where the State Farm is?!", Grimmjow asked. "GRIMMJOW, STOP!", Harribel shouted, running over to Grimmjow and hitting him on the head. "I...", Fullbody muttered softly, "...I can tell you." "You're still alive?", Grimmjow asked. "Where is it?" "It's to the left of the fishing store.", Fullbody said. "Fish?", Grimmjow asked. "Oh, right, thank you." Grimmjow and Harribel ran out onto the wooden bridge connecting the watchtower. The Marines on the bridge tried to stop the two, but they were unsuccessful as they were struck down by Desgarrón. "To the State Farm!", Grimmjow shouted. #### "Oh, come on!", Naraku shouted. "Not even a 'thank you'?! You guys are the worst ever." #### Grimmjow stared at the fishing store, his stomach rumbling. "MOVE IT!", Harribel shouted, hitting Grimmjow on the head. "We'll get something to eat AFTER we're done here!" "Fine.", Grimmjow said. The pair entered the State Farm. They saw Jake talking to someone on the phone. "Uh, khakis?", he said to the person on the other end. Grimmjow sliced one of the doors with Desgarrón. Jake physically jumped and looked at Grimmjow and Harribel. "Hey, guys!", he said, smiling and waving. "Cut the crap, Jake.", Grimmjow said. "We KNOW you stole our identities." Jake looked nervous. "What are you talking about?", he asked. "I'm talking about Desgarrón!", Grimmjow shouted, slicing Jake across the chest. "Why?", Jake asked before he fell on the ground dead. Grimmjow and Harribel ran to the computer. They could not understand any of it. "Hello?", the person on the phone, a woman, asked. "Are you still there?" Harribel picked up the phone. "Listen!", Harribel said. "Your State Farm agent has stolen your identities! Check your finances, make sure there aren't things you haven't bought on there!" "But what about Jake?", the woman asked. "He's dead.", Harribel said. "We're trying to undo this, but we don't know how many peoples' identities he's stolen by this point." "Done.", Grimmjow (who was back in his normal form) said. "How?", Harribel asked. "I'm just good with computers.", Grimmjow said. "You only restored YOUR account, didn't you?", Harribel asked. "Maybe.", Grimmjow said. Harribel hung up before crushing the phone into pieces. "Getting on it.", Grimmjow said nervously as he got back to the computer. #### "What the hell happened here?", Braden asked as he and Brandon stepped onto the bridge. A Marine reached his hand towards Brandon's foot. Once Brandon noticed it, he screamed like a girl and sliced off the Marine's hand. The Marine screamed, causing Braden to look. "You're in no shape to be screaming that loudly.", Braden asked. "What happened here?" "Grimmjow...", the Marine said. "He escaped... killed every Marine in sight... except Fullbody, he's still alive..." "...and you.", Brandon said. "Shut up.", Braden said. "Where did Grimmjow go?" "I saw him at the fishing store about 10 minutes ago.", the Marine said. "To do what?", Braden asked. The Marine gave no response. "Shit.", Braden said. "Now we gotta find Fullbody." "Braden, look!", Brandon said, pointing in the distance. Braden looked. Grimmjow and Harribel were walking out of the State Farm, which was missing a door. "Come on, Brandon!", Braden said. Brandon hopped onto Braden's back. Braden took off flying, landing near Grimmjow and Harribel. "Braden?", Grimmjow asked. "What happened?", Braden asked. "It's a long story.", Grimmjow said. "I'll explain it to you at... where's the nearest seafood restaurant?" #### The four walked into Long John Silvers. A random person at a table gasped, standing up and walking to Grimmjow. "You, sir.", the man said. "Your face defiles all that is holy. Here is a cross and holy water. May God have mercy on your soul." Grimmjow took the trinkets, looking at them. "'Face defiles all that is holy'?", Brandon asked. Everyone else laughed. THE END Nearly an hour had passed after Grimmjow's attack in Marine HQ. An unknowing Smoker rode over the bridge on his Billower Bike. Suddenly, he stopped, noticing the bodies of the Marines. "Are...", he asked in shock, "...are they all dead?!" Tashigi ran alongside the Billower Bike. She looked in shock. "What happened?!", she asked. After checking to see if any of the Marines had a pulse (which none did), they ran inside Marine HQ. There, they saw Fullbody breathing heavily while leaned against a wall. "Fullbody!", Smoker shouted as he and Tashigi ran over to Fullbody. "Captain...", Fullbody said, "...Hina... she's dead..." Fullbody's head slowly leaned over to the side, his eyes drifting off into nothingness. "Hina...", Smoker said solemnly. "My old classmate... Grimmjow shall pay dearly..." Grimmjow will return in The Admins. Don't click away! There's more below! Twelve hours had passed. Pilaf turned on the TV. "Now, Mai and Shu...", he said, "...let's see what kind of evil plan we can hatch." The current channel was the AAA News Network. "An attack on the Marines?", Jacob Fox on the screen asked as a picture of Grimmjow popped up. "Admin Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez was arrested earlier today on charges of credit card fraud, but he and his compatriot Tier Harribel escaped and killed every Marine but two that they saw; the two Marines that survived have already passed away. A bounty of 30 million Berries has been placed on Grimmjow's head. What wil the admins do now? Guess we'll just have to wait and find out..." Pilaf stared in amazement at the TV screen. "What will the admins do now, indeed.", Pilaf said, laughing. "MAI! SHU! Let's begin work on some mech suits! I have a plan?" "How long will the mech suits take to build, Lord Pilaf?", Shu asked. "Oh, about a month.", Pilaf said. "That's PLENTY of time for me to come up with a plan, right?" "I can't believe you, Lord Pilaf...", Mai said as she and Shu walked away. "Right, guys?", Pilaf asked. Category:Tales of the AAA Category:Moderate Category:Rapids' Stuff